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If your brain was money, you wouldn't have a cent
Phones are better than girlfriends, At least we can switch off.
You cry, I cry, …you laugh, I laugh…you jump off a cliff I laugh even harder!!
Relationships are a lot like algebra… Ever looked at your X and wondered Y?
Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
Autocorrect is like that person who just graduated college and think they know everything.
Great power comes with great electricity bills.
You’re beautiful until your Photoshop 30 day trial has gone.
Perfect boyfriend : Does not drink, does not smoke, does not cheat and also Does not exist ????
Food, Water, Sleep, Love, Whatsapp, Repeat it.
The best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once!
If you love someone set them free. If they come back, set them on fire.