Enjoy the best Jerry Seinfeld Quotes. Quotations by Jerry Seinfeld (Stand-up Comedian)
Born: Jan 01, 1954
There's no better place to dance than a slick surface next to a glass door.
Hello, Newman.
Dogs are the leaders of the planet. If anything happens, they have us for dinner.
A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it.
Why do people give each other flowers? They're killing living creatures?
Sex, that's meaningless, I can understand that, but dinner; that's heavy.
Looking at cleavage is like looking into the Sun. You don't stare at it.
If every instinct you have is wrong, then the opposite would have to be right.
A bookstore is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking.
If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?
A bookstore is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking.